I lost my only key to my car and the dealership keeps telling us different things every time we talk to them. They said they can make a key from the vin number but that it won't start the car and that we would have to get my car towed (across the island at a huge cost to us) to the dealership. Is there a way to get a new key without towing my car?
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The dealership should be able to make the key from the VIN. Since you do not have a registered key already, you will not be able to program it yourself. The vehicle will have to be somewhere it can be reprogrammed with the new key(s). You can call a lock smith to come out and reprogram the car, but chances are it's going to be just as expensive as having it towed (if you can find one which will do the work for you in the first place). If you had a key already, programming it yourself would be a breeze and take you only a few minutes. Your best bet here is to find the lost key, but I would bet this has already proven pointless.
Once in a while you get lucky. Have them make you a key from your VIN and try it. Some vehicles will start with an unprogrammed key - my '07 Tacoma is one of those vehicles; It'll start even with the grey (non-intelligent, door-only) key.
Try the key. If the car refuses to start with it, you'll have to go to Plan B, towing the car to where they can program the key for it.